His Wife Said She Wants Them To Be Roommates, So He’s Ready To Leave
How do you prove love to someone who refuses to see it? That’s the painful question at the center of this man’s marriage.
He’s sacrificed, he’s compromised, he’s tried to show up in every way he knows how; yet his wife keeps moving the finish line. Now he’s starting to wonder if what she’s asking for isn’t more romance, but simply a way out.
Sadly, this 27-year-old man’s 26-year-old wife said she wants to get a divorce, as she does not believe he genuinely loves her and she thinks she’s just “a trial wife.”
For the last several months, he’s been doing everything in his power to make their marriage work, even after his wife checked out.
Every single month without fail, his wife gets into a fight with him and insists she is actually “falling out of love” with him.
Now, he moved from another country, left his loved ones and career behind, just to be with his wife. He walked away from everything for her.
He doesn’t feel remorse, as he had so much love for his wife that he was all in on building something new alongside her.
His wife has pointed out that he can’t love her because he is not romantic enough. He tries his hardest, though, buying his wife flowers every week, taking her out on dates to restaurants, writing her adorable notes, and watching shows or TV with her.
Additionally, he kisses her before bed every night and before leaving for work, and he pitches in with the household chores.
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
He buys her presents, he doesn’t complain when she hangs out with her friends, and he’s basically her Uber driver.
He’s not sure how else he can prove to his wife that he loves her.
“I quit playing with my friends [via] video games or spend less time in my hobbies just to be with her and pass time with her, and still she says it’s not enough,” he explained.
“She says, ‘If you truly loved me, you would know which flowers are my favorite,’ and I know, but sometimes when I go to get them, they don’t have the flowers that you like, so I get you another ones just to make you feel loved.”
“…With bills I pay rent, electricity, her car maintenance and gas, and still invite her to dinners where she doesn’t have to pay anything. She only pays for groceries, streaming services, and other personal bills she has to pay, like car loans, etc. Even with groceries, sometimes I help her.”
His wife puts him down and says she wants a man whom she won’t have to remind. He is somewhat forgetful, but not about the things that matter.
Last weekend, she took a girls’ trip, then came home and threw it in his face that she got a ton of attention from strangers, which she loved and felt like she was actually a woman.
That really broke him, because while he’s hardly flawless, he always tries his best. His wife went on to say she wants them to be roommates and split up because she’s done with him.
But then minutes afterward, his wife gave him whiplash and asked if there was a way for them to make their marriage work.
“She told me that she loves me, but as a person, not a partner, and that she wants me to stay with her until she figures it out, but as a partner,” he added.
“Y’all want to know what’s the crazy thing? Yesterday, she said that she doesn’t want to break up with me because she’s afraid of what people will say to her. Then, [she] proceeded to break up and now regrets it.”
“That’s not love. If you love someone, you wouldn’t bring that up. Also, she’s trying to blame me now. Saying that I made up my mind only because I asked her how we were going to move forward.”
Her hot-and-cold behavior isn’t love; it’s control, and I think he’s just been blind to it. Telling him she wants a divorce one minute, then asking him to stick around “while she figures it out” the next is unfair and emotionally draining.
If she can’t decide whether she wants him as a partner, then he needs to decide for himself, because staying in limbo isn’t the same as saving a marriage.
What advice do you have for him?
You can read the original post below.
More About:Relationships
