You can spend hours in a car with someone, talk them through their worst moments, and genuinely care about what happens to them…and still somehow not make the cut for their wedding guest list. She was left reeling after her friend excluded her from her wedding, but had enough room to invite her husband’s affair partner.
This woman got super close to her coworker after only knowing her for less than a year. She would frequently give her coworker rides home, and they spent hours at a clip complaining about their jobs or just chatting as friends.
Her coworker whined a lot about how toxic her relationship was and how many red flags she saw in her boyfriend. She lent her coworker a sympathetic ear and even gave her a little guidance: dump the guy.
“But after she threatened to leave him because he was avoiding commitment, he agreed to get married, and it was all very rushed,” she explained.
“I kept my opinion to myself because I’ve already given her my advice and opinion, and she already decided to do it anyway, so I thought support was the only thing left I could do now as a friend.”
“I didn’t expect/want to be invited because 1. I thought she was making a huge mistake and felt sorry for her as a friend. 2. It looked at times like there would be no wedding at all (he called it off more than once). 3. We weren’t friends for a long enough time for me to expect to be invited to a small wedding.”
During a three-hour-long conversation with her coworker that happened inside her car following a work shift, her coworker wept about how her boyfriend would not allow her to invite her neighbor to the wedding.
She questioned her coworker about whether she considered her neighbor a best friend or something, and her coworker replied that they had been friendly for years, so it felt rude to exclude her.
Apparently, her coworker’s boyfriend (I’m not calling him a fiancé because it’s not like he got down on one knee or bought her an engagement ring) called her neighbor names and said he did not want that girl at their wedding.
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“Why the slur, you ask – BECAUSE HE CHEATED WITH HER ONCE. So I was that good of a friend to spend hours every day talking and comforting you, but not as good as your groom’s side chick?” she wondered.
So, her coworker did end up getting to invite her neighbor, the girl her now-husband had an affair with, but she excluded her from the guest list.
“Me being me, I didn’t mention how this made me feel, but we talked recently, and she mentioned her distant cousin getting married and how she was so offended to not get invited TO THE BACHELORETTE PARTY (which, as far as I know, is just for the closest friends) and how she cut that cousin off,” she continued.
She was furious to hear about her coworker’s recent updates and hypocrisy, but she kept silent instead of calling her out.
I’m really struggling to understand why she is still friends with her coworker when this girl obviously doesn’t value her or their friendship at all.
Maybe she’s still in it for the drama, because I don’t see another reason to want to keep on talking to this girl. Regardless, she needs to find some new friends and let this one go.
What advice do you have for her?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
