She’s Financially Dependent On Her Boyfriend But Wants To Break Up With Him, So Now She’s Not Sure How To Do This Without Becoming Homeless
In the Spring, this thirty-two-year-old woman and her boyfriend, who is thirty-one, are planning to move across the country together.
But they are only moving together because of how insanely expensive the housing market has become in their area. And now, she feels like she is totally screwed financially.
The issues all began earlier this summer after her boyfriend lost his own housing. And, left without a place to go, she generously offered to let her boyfriend move in with her– despite how important it was to her that she was living alone.
“My apartment means a lot to me because it was the first time in my life that I could afford to live on my own and be truly independent,” she explained.
But, at the time, letting her boyfriend move in with her just made fiscal sense since both of them thought the arrangement was only going to be temporary.
After all, her boyfriend claimed he planned to find a new apartment afterward– especially since neither of them was ready to live together yet.
Unfortunately, though, their well-intended plan just did not pan out as they had hoped. Instead, by the time they looked for a new place, they both realized there were no housing options left on the market within their budgets.
So, they were left with one more option– moving away. Her lease was going to be up a few months later anyway, and they planned to move after that happened in the late summer months. She even saved up funds and left her job accordingly.
But then, yet another hitch arose in their plan. This time, though, it was because of her boyfriend– who, at the last minute, decided he wanted to stay until the Spring because he was not ready to move across the country yet.
VK Studio – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
Thankfully, they were able to hold onto her apartment for an additional six months. However, the extended lease made their rent rise a significant amount. At the same time, her boyfriend also hit her with an ultimatum out of the blue.
“He really hated my old job and how much stress I was under there. I worked crazy hours with difficult people,” she recalled.
“So, my boyfriend told me that if I stayed at that job, he did not see us working out, and he was probably going to end up making the move without me.”
She was shocked but did not want their relationship to end. So, they ultimately decided that her boyfriend would hire her to work at his one-person (now two-person) company.
They agreed that she would be paid a very low wage in exchange for her boyfriend covering all of their bills and debts.
The weirdest part about this arrangement, though, is that she has yet to get any of the money from her boyfriend. So, she has since blown all of the money she had saved up to move away just to keep herself afloat over the last few months.
Plus, all of the money weirdness has created some serious awkwardness and tension at home.
“He is hesitant about giving me money, and it is becoming really awkward and uncomfortable. Our relationship is getting rocky– which is why he is hesitant to give me money– but I am totally immediately screwed without him right now,” she revealed.
So, even though she does kind of want to take a break to get some space from her boyfriend, she really cannot right now. In fact, if she breaks up with him, she will be homeless.
The rest of her savings is not enough to even last her one month in their current apartment, and she does not think she could find a job quick enough to make it work anyway.
And now, she has been left utterly confused about what to do.
“How do you break up with someone who you are financially dependent on?” she asked.
Do you think she might be stuck in a financially abusive situation? If you were in her shoes, what would you do to get out of this dependent cycle? Are there any resources she can turn to for help?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
If true crime defines your free time, this is for you: join Chip Chick’s True Crime Tribe
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
More About:Relationships
Read This Next
