His Son’s Teacher Was Only Addressing His Girlfriend During A Parent-Teacher Conference, So He Asked To Be Spoken To Also As His Son’s Father, And Now His Brother-In-Law Thinks He Overreacted

DmitryDolgikh - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual child
DmitryDolgikh - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual child

This twenty-eight-year-old man has a son named Nathan, who is six. And currently, he is Nathan’s sole parent because his son’s mother lost custody.

So, Nathan’s school was informed of the custody change after he removed his ex’s details from the school contact system. He also gave his son’s current teacher insight into the situation as a safety precaution.

“Due to the nature of the custody battle, his teacher does know about my ex for safety reasons, as she has been barred from coming to the school to get him,” he explained.

“Basically, his teacher knows that if she ever sees me with a woman, it is definitely not my ex.”

Anyway, Nathan’s school typically holds parent-teacher conferences twice each year– once before Christmas break and a second time at the end of the academic year.

Now, he has been dating a new woman named Venus, who is twenty-four, for about eight months now. And according to him, Venus has a stellar relationship with his son.

Nathan likes Venus so much, in fact, that his son even asked if she could attend the parent-teacher conference, too.

Apparently, his son wanted his girlfriend to see just how well everything was going at school– especially because Venus actually helped Nathan with his schoolwork a lot.

“My son used to struggle with English as his mother tongue is Spanish. My Spanish is okay, but Venus is fluent. So, she helped Nathan improve his English speaking by tutoring him,” he said.

DmitryDolgikh – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual child

So, Venus ultimately agreed to go to the parent-teacher conference with him before Christmas break. And at first, the couple was excited to attend together for Nathan’s sake.

But then, during the meeting, he started to realize that his son’s teacher was only really speaking to his girlfriend. In fact, he claims that the teacher was only making eye contact with Venus and directed all of the conversations toward her.

And understandably, he found that quite annoying. He admitted to knowing that traditionally, the “primary parents are women.” However, Nathan’s teacher is well aware that he is a single father and Nathan’s sole guardian.

Venus apparently noticed the disconnect, too, and attempted to redirect the conversation toward him on numerous occasions. He also asked a few questions about his son as well.

Still, though, he claims that Nathan’s teacher would only speak to him for a couple of seconds. Then, she would go right back to conversing with Venus.

So, after a while of trying to let it slide, he realized that his son’s teacher was not getting the hint, and he finally spoke up for himself.

“I’m sorry to interrupt you, but I am Nathan’s father, and I would appreciate it if you spoke to me,” he told the teacher.

Now, the teacher was reportedly taken aback and seemed a bit irritated, according to him. Nonetheless, his comment worked, and the teacher only spoke to him for the rest of the parent-teacher conference.

After that whole incident, he also decided to tell his brother-in-law about what had happened. While speaking with him, though, he was shocked to learn that his brother-in-law actually believed he had overreacted.

Apparently, his brother-in-law agreed that it could be annoying when teachers only speak to the women present during parent-teacher conferences. But, his brother-in-law claimed that it was not out of malice but merely a force of habit since “mothers tend to be more involved than fathers.”

He also got accused of making the situation more complicated by agreeing to bring Venus along. So, his brother-in-law essentially told him he was a jerk for deciding to interrupt the teacher and making her feel like she had done something wrong.

This ordeal also got brought up again during his recent family Christmas celebration, which Venus attended. Apparently, it all began after his mother asked Venus if she had Nathan’s inhaler on her, and his brother-in-law chimed in with a snarky remark.

“Careful, Mark might freak out now,” his brother-in-law said, alluding to the parent-teacher conference incident.

That comment immediately took him aback, particularly because he had forgotten all about what happened and thought the situation had been put to rest.

Now, though, because of his brother-in-law’s remark, the parent-teacher conference is fresh in his mind again. So, he has been left wondering if asking his son’s teacher to speak to him, and not his girlfriend, was justified or if it actually just made him a jerk.

Why do you think his son’s teacher was only addressing Venus? Even if it is a “force of habit” to address female caregivers, should that be the accepted norm? What about the fact that his teacher explicitly knew about his custody situation and that he is Nathan’s sole parent? If you had been in his shoes, would you have said something to the teacher, too?

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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Katharina Buczek graduated from Stony Brook University with a degree in Journalism and a minor in Digital Arts. Specializing ... More about Katharina Buczek

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