She Said Her Sister Has Never Done Anything To Deserve Being The Maid Of Honor At Her Wedding
This 26-year-old woman has a younger sister, who is 22. Unfortunately, though, they have never had a close relationship, and she actually never considered her sister to be a good friend or even a caring family member.
Now, she realizes that most of this was not really her sister’s fault. Instead, she blames it on her parents– who believed that, since she was older, she constantly needed to make sacrifices for her little sister.
For instance, if they were getting takeout and her sister wanted pizza– but she wanted Chinese– her sister got her way. After all, her sister was “the baby,” meaning that she was expected to agree for her sister’s sake.
The same thing would happen if they were invited to birthday parties on the same day. Her sister got to go, but she was supposed to be okay with just staying home.
This became a major theme in her life, with everything from her sister getting to pick family movies and her being required to watch her sister at any time to her sister even getting more of a say in their family vacation destinations.
“We were all supposed to get a vote,” she explained, referring to where they went on vacation.
“But my sister’s always counted as two. So, after a while, it seemed pointless.”
She admitted to realizing that this imbalance between older and younger siblings is not uncommon. She even said that when done in moderation, she doesn’t necessarily think it’s a bad thing.
However, there was never any balance in her family or evening out of the scales.
hreniuca – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
“My parents would argue that being older meant I had more freedom, and that was what I should focus on,” she recalled.
“But that freedom meant nothing because I couldn’t make the most of it.”
So, throughout their childhood, she claimed that her sister always expected her to let her sister get away with anything.
Although, by the time she moved out of her childhood house– and was no longer in her parent’s lives or her sister’s life– things seemed like they might change.
At that point, her sister had just turned 17-years-old and wound up reaching out to her– asking why she decided to leave.
And she claimed that she was upfront and honest about how she truly felt throughout their childhood.
Afterward, her sister reportedly claimed that she would do better. So, they started working to repair their relationship, and she would call her sister out about being selfish whenever old patterns started to repeat themselves.
Quite frankly, though, she revealed how their efforts did not really change anything for the better.
“It hasn’t really improved, and I have felt the relationship is more of a chore than a joy in my life,” she admitted.
And as of just a few weeks ago, she and her sister’s relationship became the center of even more drama.
It all began after she and her partner got engaged. Afterward, she was over the moon and decided to ask three of her closest friends to be her bridesmaids.
At the same time, she also opted to forgo having a maid of honor since she loves all three of her best friends equally.
Once her sister found out about her engagement, though, her sister apparently assumed that she would be the maid of honor. So, that meant she was forced to tell her sister no.
If you could not have guessed, her sister was shocked and wanted to know why she was not being given that role.
And this meant that, yet again, she had to be honest with her sister. She told her sister that being the maid of honor is a very special role. So, since they were not close enough, making her sister the maid of honor just would not be right.
Her sister did not understand that, though, and actually claimed to deserve the role since she had been a good sister. Then, her sister also accused her of being mean and taking the past out on her sister.
But she did not let her sister get away with those accusations and pointed out how her sister had done literally nothing to deserve the title of maid of honor.
She also claimed that their issues were not just in the past because her sister still actively acts as though her opinions and choices are valued less than her sister’s.
At that point, her sister wound up just crying and claiming that she had been trying to be better.
Plus, she got accused of just being mean instead of giving her sister time to change their relationship.
“But it has been five years of me calling her out and of me telling her when she is acting like she has since we were kids,” she vented.
Anyway, after their argument, her sister ended up leaving and has been seriously upset with her ever since.
So, even though she stands behind her opinions about her sister’s behavior, she has still been left wondering whether claiming that her sister has done nothing to deserve the maid of honor title made her a real jerk or not.
Are her frustrations about favoritism and lack of balance understandable? After everything that has happened, can you believe her sister assumed she would be the maid of honor? Did she have a right to call her sister out and stick up for herself? If you had been in her shoes, would you have done the same?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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