She Told Her Friend She Didn’t Think Her College Fund Was A “Complete Blessing” Because Of The Trauma She Went Through To Get That Money, But Her Friend Just Got Mad At Her
This 24-year-old woman went to college in the United States. And because she received a significant merit scholarship– valued at $20,000 per year– in addition to getting an on-campus job and using her college fund, her parents only had to directly contribute a low amount toward her tuition. She also did not need to take out any loans.
Unfortunately, though, the money in her college fund was the result of a very tumultuous period in her life.
Back when she was just 13, one of her family friend’s daughters– who was like a cousin to her– passed away due to cancer.
Then, later that same year, her maternal grandmother and uncle both died very suddenly within just two months of each other.
Apparently, her grandmother had been diagnosed with aggressive cancer. And shortly after her grandmother’s memorial service, her uncle was found dead.
Plus, on top of dealing with all of this grief herself, the loss also led her parent’s marriage to break down.
“My dad never liked my uncle and would make comments like, ‘There’s only so much you can do for people like that,'” she explained.
“And my mom– who was very close with her brother– resents him for keeping my sister and me from having a closer relationship with him.”
After that, her brother, who was just 11-years-old at the time, developed an eating disorder that still requires treatment.
gzorgz – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
And to this day, her brother has panic attacks if either one of their parents calls after midnight because he worries that someone else in their family might have died.
This all meant that while she grew up, she became the peacemaker and basically like a third parent– looking out for her brother while her mom recovered from all of the loss.
In the wake of her grandmother and uncle’s death, she and her sister also inherited money for college from their wills.
“But I would have rather had them alive and have had to go to a less expensive college as a result,” she said.
Just recently, though, one of her guy friends from college, who is 24, asked if she had heard about the student loan repayment pause.
And she told him that she had heard but that she didn’t know much else about it because she didn’t have student loans.
Well, after she told her friend that, he reportedly started asking her a ton of questions about her family’s financial situation. For context, her dad is a teacher, and her mom currently works part-time.
Then, her friend asked how she was able to afford college without taking out any loans.
Now, she honestly did not want to get into all of the backstories. So, she just told her friend that she landed a big scholarship and also had some contributions from her extended family.
Her friend seemingly took that all wrong, though, and became frustrated. Then, he began complaining about “rich people who act poor but will never actually struggle.”
At that point, she attempted to explain how she actually got all of that money. After all, it’s not like her grandparents were millionaires and sending her cash from their yacht docked in the Caribbean.
“And in my explanation, I said I was obviously grateful but that I didn’t consider it a ‘complete blessing’ because of the huge impacts it had on me and my family,” she recalled.
Her friend still did not understand her point, though, and actually just got really upset that she said that.
Then, he accused her of “trying to play the oppression Olympics” and got all upset that she hid the “truth” about her family’s finances from him.
Apparently, her friend did receive federal grants and merit aid from his college. However, he was still forced to take out a federal loan.
So anyway, while she stands behind her point that getting her college fund money was complicated and traumatic, she knows that she still graduated without loans at the end of the day– which she realizes is a luxury many students don’t have.
And now, she has been left wondering whether not considering her college fund “a complete blessing” makes her a jerk or not.
Is she allowed to have mixed feelings about the origin of her college fund? Why do you think her friend got so offended by her comments? Should her friend be mad at her or the education system?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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