He Decided Not To Be A Groomsman In His Friend’s Wedding Because He Simply Could Not Afford The Bride’s Expectations

This 27-year-old man has had a guy friend, who is 24, for about five years. And next month, his friend will be getting married.
So, he was asked to be one of the groomsmen. But quite frankly, he just cannot afford to do that, given his financial situation right now.
For context, the bride and groom have been dating for about two years and grew up in completely different worlds.
His friend’s fiancée, for instance, came from money and was raised by an upper-class adoptive family. That’s why the woman is friends with many people who come from the same economic class.
His friend, on the other hand, comes from a very low-income family– as does he and the rest of their friend group.
So, most of their social circle is still living paycheck to paycheck right now.
Regardless, right after his friend proposed, his friend’s fiancée decided that the wedding would happen within six months.
“Despite everyone around them trying to suggest giving more time to plan and have everything in place,” he said.
And to be clear, this wedding will not be a small event, either. Instead, his friend is actually having a destination wedding with about 250 people on the guest list!

andrey – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
Plus, he claimed that his friend did not even want to have a wedding of this magnitude. His friend actually just wanted a simple and small wedding with close friends and family.
“But my friend is going along with it as he understands that she has dreamed of a big wedding since she was a small child,” he explained.
Still, there is one major problem– his friend group is not well-off. And while they made do and always managed to have a great time despite not having a ton of money, his one friend’s wedding is shaping up to be a massive expenditure.
His friend’s fiancée apparently made all of the decisions for the wedding, including factors that would impact the groomsmen.
For instance, she picked a suit service, suit styles, shoes, and belts. So, just for the wardrobe, the total comes out to about $600 per person.
And honestly, many of the groomsmen just cannot afford such a high bill– especially given the short notice of the wedding.
“My friend couldn’t care less what we wear to the wedding,” he added.
“But his fiancée has explicitly said that if we are not wearing the designated suits, we will note in the wedding party.”
That’s why he was forced to tell his friend that while he would love to be a groomsman, he simply could not afford it. He also reassured his friend that he would still love to be at the wedding. And thankfully, his friend was understanding.
However, his friend’s fiancée has begun painting him as the bad guy.
“She is acting like I’ve ruined everything by choosing not to be in the wedding party,” he vented.
So now, he’s been left wondering whether opting not to be a groomsman because he just cannot afford it really makes him a jerk or not.
Why do you think his friend’s fiancée cannot understand his decision? Does it sound like he’s making the best financial choice for himself? Is that what matters most? What would you do?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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