He’s Upset That His In-Laws Asked Him To “Tone Down” His Gift-Giving This Christmas, But His In-Laws Just Feel Guilty That They Aren’t Able To Buy His Fiancée And Her Siblings More Gifts And Don’t Want It Rubbed In Their Faces
Not long ago, this man was talking to his future mother-in-law about the plans he and his fiancée had for Christmas.
Each year, he and his fiancée get together with her family for Christmas.
This includes his fiancée’s parents, her older brother, her brother’s husband, and her younger sister.
He’s always admired that her family gets into the holiday spirit and has a blast putting in a lot of effort into getting great gifts for everyone, even when everyone is an adult because he goes all out as well for Christmas.
Every holiday season, he has so much fun buying a ton of gifts for his fiancée that he knows she’ll adore, and he feels the same way when he buys gifts for her family members.
He earns a higher salary than his fiancée’s parents and her siblings, and besides paying property taxes, he doesn’t have to pay for housing.
For him, it’s a joy to be able to spend a lot of money on Christmas gifts for his fiancée.
“While I was talking to my soon-to-be mother-in-law, she mentioned that she and her husband were hoping that I would ‘tone down’ Christmas this year,” he said.
“I didn’t know what she meant, and she said that the number of gifts I get for my fiancée makes her and her husband feel a bit uncomfortable.”
Dmitry Kovalchuk – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only
Because he was still not sure what his mother-in-law wanted, he asked her for some clarification.
She requested that he give fewer gifts to his fiancée during their family Christmas celebration and give her the rest of her gifts in private, either before or after the family get-together.
Her explanation was confusing for him, so he asked her if she was asking him to buy more gifts for her, her husband, and his fiancée’s siblings. His mother-in-law said she didn’t.
“I then asked if she would like me to give her and her husband some more money to get my fiancée (and her siblings) more gifts,” he explained.
“She declined that offer as well and seemed a bit irritated with that. After that, I asked if she wanted to write that some of the presents I got for my fiancée were from her and her husband (none of us actually sign the ‘from’ label, but my fiancée, of course, knows the difference in our handwriting).”
In response, she said that he didn’t need to do that, and all she was requesting was for him to give the gifts he bought his fiancée to her before or after they all got together.
He thought his mother-in-law’s request was annoying, and he didn’t think it was reasonable, so he told her this during their phone call.
“She then said that she and her husband feel guilty that they couldn’t get my fiancée and her siblings more gifts, so they didn’t want to see the extent of what I would get her, but they don’t want me to hold off on getting her all that I will altogether,” he shared.
In the end, he rejected her request and told her that he would still plan on giving his fiancée all of her gifts during the family Christmas celebration, and both he and his mother-in-law agreed to finish their talk another time.
He thinks it’s strange that they don’t want him to shower his fiancée with gifts while they’re around.
However, upon reflection, he wonders if he’s not understanding their point of view and points out that maybe he’s just being stubborn in his perspective.
He added that a long time ago, he was diagnosed with Asperger’s.
What advice would you give him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
If true crime defines your free time, this is for you: join Chip Chick’s True Crime Tribe
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
More About:Relationships
