Her Boyfriend Stopped Kissing Her Because Of Her Bad Breath, So She’s Considering Ending Their Relationship
This 26-year-old woman has been with her 30-year-old boyfriend for nearly three years, and he’s the first boyfriend that she has ever had.
Back when she began dating him, he came on super strong, and they used to kiss a ton. She says they were “freshly in love.”
But then, a year into their being together, things got so tough that they nearly broke up over their issues.
Luckily, they resolved what they were struggling with, which was her boyfriend’s fierce independence not pairing well with her overwhelming codependency.
As this was all going down, her boyfriend severely injured his lip, and it took him half a year to heal up, though his lip bothered him for an entire year.
Throughout her boyfriend’s healing process, kissing was entirely off the table, so that, paired with their personal problems, really made for a rough time.
Everything has been smooth sailing for a bit more than a year, and therapy has helped them learn to talk through things.
She characterizes their relationship as full of harmony right now, and they spend a lot of time together.
However, they don’t kiss like they used to, and that really upsets her. During Christmas, she tried to initiate kissing her boyfriend, but he pulled away from her. She finally worked up the courage to ask her boyfriend about it this week.
Look! – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
“I told him that I miss kissing him and that I sometimes had the feeling he avoided kissing me and that I wanted to know why because none of the answers my brain supplied were particularly nice,” she explained.
“After a little sputtering on his part, he told me that I sometimes had bad breath, and on that particular day before Christmas, it had been especially bad, so he just couldn’t do it.”
“I was…kind of relieved because that was at least something I could work on and told him that I wished he’d told me earlier. He said he didn’t because he didn’t know how, and he didn’t want to hurt my feelings.”
They then made New Year’s resolutions; she would work on fixing her terrible breath, and he said he would make sure to let her know if he thought her breath smelled extra awful.
She felt good about that conversation, and she has made an effort to hold up her end of the bargain. She’s gone to a doctor; she’s brushing three times a day, using mouthwash, and flossing too.
A few days after this talk, she brushed her teeth and headed over to her boyfriend’s place. As soon as she sat down with him, he instantly said she should probably consider brushing her teeth.
Although her boyfriend told her in a gentle way and he was trying to not be mean, she was shocked and dismayed.
“We talked about my bad breath a little more as I was worried it always smelled bad, and he assured me that it wasn’t always by far, just sometimes, and that it also didn’t smell like ‘normal’ bad breath but somehow different,” she said.
“It also wasn’t a recent development, as far as he remembered, but always sometimes the case. He also told me that I shouldn’t worry too much as it really wasn’t that often. However, I do worry…I’m now paranoid about my breath, as apparently, even brushing my teeth doesn’t mean I am safe. And to relate back to my original problem: I’m afraid to start kissing my boyfriend because I fear my breath will smell and he’ll be disgusted.”
So, she’s left with enormous anxiety about the situation, and she’s not sure how to move forward. She keeps believing there has to be more to the story and that her boyfriend secretly doesn’t want her anymore or finds her gross.
Aside from the speed bumps with kissing, things are good with them. They are planning for the future together, and her boyfriend is a total sweetheart.
She’s debating talking about the topic with her boyfriend again, which makes her hesitant to bring it up all over again, as it’s awkward, and she’s sick of discussing kissing with him.
“I have honestly been thinking about ending our relationship because I miss kissing him and feeling like someone wants to kiss me so badly, even though I really don’t want to do this because he’s amazing, and I don’t want to lose him so I need to get this figured out,” she continued.
What advice do you have for her?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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