Her Husband Is $75,000 In Debt And Kept That A Secret From Her
This 26-year-old woman has been married to her 27-year-old husband for the last five years, and they have known each other for a decade.
Their relationship was always stable and full of love. From the get-go, she and her husband made the decision to keep their finances separate, and her husband agreed to pay for their largest bills and mortgage, while she would pay for additional things and try to save.
“He’s a retired veteran in college, receiving a steady, tax-free income. I work in healthcare in a mid-level management role,” she explained.
“I’ve been saving diligently and have around $60K put away for emergencies and towards retirement. He’s always told me he was in a similar financial position, and I had no reason to doubt him.”
“Over the past year, we’ve been seriously discussing starting a family and moving out of our starter home to be closer to relatives.”
Since she was under the impression that she and her husband had the money necessary to have a baby, she was in the middle of planning to take maternity leave and perhaps take more time off post-baby.
A couple of days ago, when her husband came home, he was acting strange. When she asked him why that was, he told her something shocking.
Apparently, he’s $75,000 in debt and has been keeping that a secret from her. As for his savings, so to speak, it’s just a few hundred dollars, which is wildly different than what she expected.
“The only loan I knew about was one taken out in December 2022 for a new roof. It had a 12-month, no-interest period, and we had agreed to pay it off in full before that expired,” she continued.
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“He told me it was paid off, but it turns out there’s still a $16,000 balance and 25% interest. I feel shocked, overwhelmed, and betrayed.”
“He let me believe we were in a position to grow our family, financially stable, secure, and on the same page. Meanwhile, he was hiding a mountain of debt for at least two years. He’s now suggesting a cash-out refinance on our home to cover it. I’m struggling with this, especially because it feels like he isn’t fully taking ownership of the situation.”
Her husband has said sorry and seems to be remorseful, and she is aware it was difficult for him to come clean after keeping his debt hidden from her.
She would hate to file for divorce over this, but she feels deeply betrayed and like she can no longer trust her husband.
What advice do you have for her?
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