Her Fiancé Called Off Their Wedding And Will Not Tell Her Why, But He Still Wants To Stay In A Relationship, So She Has Been Left Beyond Confused
This fifty-year-old woman from Germany has been with her boyfriend, who is forty-six, for twelve years now.
He had been in a previous marriage but got divorced back in 2014 before they met. And she has never tied the knot before but always envisioned herself ending up married when the right guy came along.
So, after they entered a relationship and it became more serious, they discussed the topic a lot. Her boyfriend was reportedly always kind of “hot and cold” about the whole possibility.
But, she claims that she was clear from the very beginning about her future intentions.
“I believe in marriage, and it is something I will only do once and only with the right person,” she recalled telling him.
And come April of this year, she decided to finally take charge and offer herself and her boyfriend a shot at the long haul once and for all.
She figured that a woman proposing to a man could be just as romantic and popped the terrifying question. Then, to her joy, her boyfriend said yes.
So, she immediately began all of the planning– which, in Germany, entails a lot of paperwork and documents.
Plus, once the administrative aspects were squared away, she and her then-fiancé began planning the actual wedding together.
Alinnan – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
They set a date, picked out and booked a venue, and discussed last names. The pair also figured out where they were going to purchase their rings and the style of the event.
They settled on a small wedding with no church or reception– simply a nice dinner after the ceremony with their family members.
And according to her, he was thoroughly informed and completely on board with one hundred percent of the decisions. She also pointed out how, during the entire planning process, her fiancé never once displayed any feelings of nervousness or doubt.
“There were no arguments or discussions, nor a feeling he’s not happy,” she said.
Regardless, her fiancé had apparently hidden his marriage fears deep, deep down, until one random Sunday when they all spilled out.
The couple had gone out to eat dinner together when, during the middle of their meal, her fiancé had an outburst and finally revealed that he did not want to marry her. And obviously, she was shell-shocked.
“I still keep on playing it through in my head. Did I miss any signs? Pressure him into something he never wanted? I am sighing inwardly just thinking about this, about how we went from looking forward to a wedding to a complete halt,” she revealed.
The most bizarre part of it all, though, is that her fiancé has refused to discuss his reasons for calling off the wedding. Ever since the dinner, he has apparently remained tight-lipped and has continued living as if nothing happened without saying a word.
On top of that, he has also shared how he still wants to remain in a relationship. To be honest, though, she cannot help but think that this might be a sign to start fresh.
After all, she has seen couples spend even just six months to a year together before making marital commitments. So, she has been forced to consider that maybe she is just not the right woman.
At the same time, though, she is still head over heels in love with her fiancé and cannot believe that he would just call off the wedding– which was set to take place on December 16– without even telling her why.
“I am walking around with a huge hole in my chest and trying to understand him. Love shouldn’t hurt this way. I was– no, I still am– so deeply hurt and ashamed having to say to everyone we won’t be marrying,” she explained.
So now, she wishes that she could just turn off her feelings of anger and sadness, but that’s not how it works. She would not have asked her fiancé to marry her if it were that easy; if she did not truly love him.
In turn, she has been left staring at the calendar– where she has a big red circle around what was supposed to be her wedding day– and is completely confused about how to move past this.
Can you imagine having your wedding called off so close to the date? What about if your partner would not tell you why they called it off but still want to remain together? Would you stay with them or start fresh? What advice do you have for her to move forward?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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