He Called His Girlfriend Selfish And Lazy After She Refused To Learn Sign Language In Order To Communicate With His Daughter
This man has a 12-year-old daughter named Ruby, who was born mute. So, even though she can understand words, he and his daughter typically communicate using sign language.
“While she can use her phone or write, she obviously prefers to sign,” he said.
About nine months ago, though, he started dating his girlfriend, Amanda. She had her own daughter named Mia, too, who is 7-years-old. So, about three months ago, he and Amanda decided to introduce their daughters.
The largest issue was that neither Amanda nor Mia knew sign language– which made communicating with his daughter a bit awkward at first. Apparently, Ruby hates having to use her phone or write to communicate while at home.
So, this pushed him to teach Amanda a few basic signs before the initial meeting. Afterward, he also continued teaching both his girlfriend and his girlfriend’s daughter, Mia.
“Mia is getting a lot better, actually,” he added.
More recently, though, Amanda decided that sign language was just too hard and refused to keep learning anymore.
His girlfriend also claimed that it was “unnecessary” for her to learn since Ruby can understand and communicate with her in other ways.
While Ruby is able and usually willing to do that for Amanda and Mia, though, she really does not enjoy it. Instead, his daughter actually just finds it quite frustrating.
kleberpicui – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual child
So, after Amanda told him that, he wound up calling her selfish and lazy. He also claimed it was completely unfair of her to place all the effort on Ruby.
After all, he believes it is one thing if his girlfriend tries to learn sign language and never gets it after years.
But she has only been learning signs for a few months– so he thinks it is ridiculous for her to give up already.
If you could not have guessed it, though, their opposing opinions ended up sparking a massive fight between them.
During the argument, his girlfriend also accused him of being a jerk and claimed it was not her fault that she struggled with sign language.
“But that doesn’t mean just give up. If she wants to be in our lives, it is the bare minimum effort to put in,” he vented.
Anyway, after this incident, he went to confide in his brother about the situation. He explained how he really believes Amanda is being selfish; meanwhile, his girlfriend thinks he is being totally unfair.
To his complete surprise, though, his brother actually agreed with Amanda.
Apparently, his brother claimed that he could not force his girlfriend to learn and said that not everyone was good with languages.
Finally, his brother even told him that Ruby did not need his girlfriend to learn and actually accused him of “coddling” his daughter.
Even after hearing his brother’s perspective, though, he is still pretty upset with Amanda. Normally, his girlfriend is kind and thoughtful– and he thought she would view his expectation as reasonable.
Although, ever since their big fight– and his discussion with his brother– he has still been left wondering whether calling Amanda selfish for refusing to learn sign language was justified or a jerky thing to do.
Is it fair that Amanda is placing the burden of communication on his 12-year-old daughter? Why do you think his girlfriend was so quick to give up trying to learn sign language? Should that be a dealbreaker for his relationship or not? How would you handle this situation if you were in his shoes?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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