She's About To Lose Her House, But Her Multimillionaire Brother Won't Help Her Out

For years, her brother positioned himself as her permanent safety net. But when she finally needed him in order to prevent a total financial and mental collapse, it turned out to be a mirage. While she faces bankruptcy and the loss of her home, her brother is busy spending his money on a pool and flying across the globe.

For the majority of her life, this 39-year-old woman was close to her 44-year-old brother. They used to have loads of inside jokes and wonderful memories that they made with one another.

If you asked her a decade ago who she considered to be her best friend, she would have said her brother. Their bond grew even closer after losing their dad to cancer ten years ago.

She and her brother were diagnosed with anxiety disorder and panic disorder due to the trauma and grief surrounding the loss of their dad.

"There is so much context here that it would take hours to write out, but the basics are: 1) my brother married a woman who has a lot of mental health issues and very difficult personality traits, 2) My brother became extremely financially successful (I would estimate at least 25 million, if not more), 3) I married and had a child, 4) I had a full panic disorder crisis last spring, resulting in leaving my job, 5) I have struggled to find work since, despite applying, upskilling, trying entrepreneurial ventures, updating resume, LinkedIn, etc., 6) My financial situation got so bad due to this that we were at risk of losing our home, car, and/or going bankrupt," she explained.

All along, her brother has promised to give her financial help if she found herself in need, and she previously declined her brother's assistance.

But lately, her brother has backed out of trying to help her, even though he still has plenty of cash. He redid his whole backyard and put in a pool, which cost him over $80,000.

He went on vacation to other countries and paid to have a nanny watch his kids while he was gone. He bought another house. So, he's still rolling in money, and she's been trying to bring up how hard she's struggling, but her brother has been ignoring her pleas.

A month ago, she pretty much had a breakdown and called her brother up to specifically ask him for help. She said she is close to losing her house, her car, or filing for bankruptcy.

Dasha Petrenko - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

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She didn't ask her brother for a certain amount of money; she just wanted to know if he could be there for her, and he said no.

"I feel completely gutted that my brother would refuse to help me in a time of crisis when he has the means. We haven't spoken since," she added.

"There is so much more context here, but I have been a really good sister to him and aunt to his sons. I haven't been able to offer anything financially, but I have treated his children like my own, and quietly endured many issues with his wife, trying to be understanding that she has her own struggles like everyone else."

"I have tried to keep our family together despite the traumatic loss of my dad 10 years ago. My entire life, he has positioned himself like a third parent to me - very protective, but also very supportive. Suddenly, he seems to want no part of my family life and explicitly said he will not help financially."

Her brother's excuse for not being able to step up for her is that his wife gives him a hard time. But she knows her brother was the one to tell her no, not his wife.

She's been sobbing every single day since that phone call, and she also wrote her brother close to a dozen letters that she has yet to send him.

She's curious if she was wrong to expect her brother to save her in her time of need. The last year of her life has been super rough on her, and she had to overcome a total mental health crisis.

She's still not back to her normal self, and her brother is fully aware of all of the trials and tribulations she's faced lately.

"If I had asked him for money year after year, or if I was being irresponsible and asking him to float me while making bad choices, it would be different. But he has always offered to help, and when I finally truly needed it, he said no," she continued.

I understand why she's so upset, because I know for a fact my loved ones would jump in to help me if I ever needed it, so it has to hurt to ask for a liferaft and basically be told to sink or swim.

I do think she did the wrong thing in quitting her job outright, then looking to her brother to help make up for that loss of income, which she essentially did, whether she realizes it or not.

That fact alone could be why her brother isn't willing to pitch in, as she is not bringing in any money of her own. My heart goes out to her for having such a hard time with her mental health that she felt quitting was her only option, but that was not a good decision.

Considering she is unemployed, her brother may be viewing her as a lifelong financial commitment or burden on him, which is different than a one-time bailout.

What do you think? Is it reasonable for a wealthy sibling to say no to a bailout if they believe the other person has no sustainable plan to support themselves afterward?

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