She’s Sharing A Story That Demonstrates Exactly How People With Anxious Attachment Styles Operate
There are four types of attachment styles: secure, avoidant, disorganized, and anxious. Today, we’ll be focusing on anxious attachment.
TikToker Audrianna Daniel (@utterlyaud) is sharing a story that demonstrates exactly how people with anxious attachment styles operate and how that specific attachment style can have a negative impact on relationships.
One night, Audrianna and her boyfriend were discussing over dinner how easy and great their relationship was.
They hardly ever had any conflicts except for one disagreement where her boyfriend said she seemed to have been acting out of character.
On the night of that particular disagreement, Audrianna had gotten upset with him because she felt like his “energy was off.”
Then, she grew frustrated because he didn’t understand why she would feel like his energy was off. So in a fit of desperation, she went on about how maybe they both had too much baggage and shouldn’t be together anymore.
So that was the disagreement her boyfriend was referring to where Audrianna didn’t really seem like herself. However, she realized that behavior was actually very in character for her because she is someone with an anxious attachment style.
That sort of behavior is quite common in people with an anxious attachment style. It’s called protest behavior, which is any action that is taken to try to draw attention to themselves and an attempt to reconnect with their partner.
When an anxiously attached person doesn’t feel safe, they’re ready to run away. And Audrianna explains that this is because you want the other person to fight for you to show they really care.
Joshua Resnick – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people
However, if you want to be in a healthy relationship where you can build trust with your partner, Audrianna says you need to put an end to the protest behavior.
It’s a hard pill to swallow, but if you’re flip-flopping between wanting to break up and being completely satisfied in the relationship, your partner will always be at a loss trying to figure you out.
You can get stuck in a vicious cycle, but you can overcome it by being mindful of your anxiety. And just remember that your thoughts are what’s causing you to feel unsafe, even when you’re not.
You are safe even when you’re anxious!
@utterlyaud This was the hardest pill for me to swallow. Protest behaviors destroy trust with our partners but it can be overcome ?? #SeeHerGreatness #fyp #fyp? #healing #healingjourney #healingtiktok #anxiety #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #attachmentstyle #anxietyrelief #relationship #dating #datingadvice #datingstorytime #love
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