She Dropped Out Of Being Her Friend’s Maid Of Honor A Few Months Before The Wedding After Her Friend Turned Into A Bridezilla
This is a story about a girl who finally gave up her coveted maid of honor title after having enough of the bride’s BS.
They’ve been friends for 20 years. Ok, maybe it’s more accurate to say they’ve known each other for 20 years. After all, they’re not friends-friends, but friends for 12 years then acquaintances for 8.
Technically she’s her oldest friend. By that, I mean she’s known her for the longest. It’s complicated.
Any way you look at it, does that sound like a strong bond, strong enough for her to ask you to be her maid of honor (MOH)? Ahem (clearing my throat).
Who wouldn’t want to share one of the most important days of their lives with someone they knew before their boobs came in?
Of course, even though you’ve barely spoken for the past eight years, you know her well, at least who she was when she was before you read the last original Baby-Sitters Club book.
This is the basis for the saga of this girl who hesitantly but gracefully accepted the invitation to be the maid of honor at an old friend’s wedding.
It’s been a two-year engagement, and since they’re not close friends, most of their conversations revolve around the wedding. To be more accurate, 90% of their conversations are about the bride. It’s to the point where phone calls and meetings are so self-centered it’s become exhausting and annoying.
Don’t get me wrong; the bride is entitled to feel the excitement and wants everything to be perfect.
Mehmed – stock.adobe.com
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But, it’s common for brides to be consumed by the planning to where they don’t talk about anything else; it’s no longer fun for everyone involved. Friendships and family relationships can fall by the wayside while a bridezilla tramples feelings and ideas.
This is what happened in this story. We all know the list of responsibilities that comes along with the duties of the MOH. But unfortunately, along with preset expectations comes the cost of money and time, which can be hard to come by, especially during a pandemic.
The MOH really tried to meet the hopes of her friend but fell short in the eyes of the bride. It was never enough.
She finally snapped, “I don’t know or like any of the other girls in the bridal party. I was sick of the constant wedding chatter and the nagging for purchases. I accompanied her to buy her dress, made invitations, and planned her bachelorette. Still, nothing ever seemed good enough, and the other bridesmaids were always undermining any plans I made.”
“She went behind my back and was planning her bachelorette with another bridesmaid even though I had already made an itinerary (IN PDF FORMAT) including everything she wanted, and she had approved it. I warned my friend (the bride) about having too many chefs in the kitchen. I asked her not to go behind my back double planning; we had this issue before. But she still went behind my back again. Everything was planned and set, so when the other bridesmaid sent a different itinerary to the group chat so we could “have more options.”
She finally told the bride she was done six months before the big event. She didn’t want to spend more money she didn’t have on something she wasn’t enjoying, and she was feeling undervalued, frustrated, and mentally exhausted. She didn’t even feel like they were friends anymore.
The bride is pissed and shame-blamed her friend for everything. Read the original post or weigh in here on Reddit.
My take: You are not the AH for knowing when you can no longer be someone’s doormat. Although the bride may be disappointed, those are 18 months of your life you will never get back.
Six months is plenty of time to jump off that boat. If it were six weeks before, maybe I would say suck it up, but she’ll get over it.
Whatever reasons she chose you, they weren’t the right reasons for you. Put that IN PDF FORMAT.
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