She Suffered A Miscarriage Last Year That Led To Her Marriage Ending, But Her Cousin Recently Lost Their Late Fiancé And It Sparked A “Grief Competition” At Christmas Dinner
This young woman, unfortunately, suffered a miscarriage last year, and it was honestly the worst moment of her life. Moreover, the loss ended up hitting her marriage really hard.
She and her husband even ended up getting a divorce, which just got finalized last month. So, she has still been reeling from grief.
“It’s honestly a different type of pain,” she opened up.
Thankfully, she does have a wonderful group of friends and some caring family members who have served as a great support system throughout this difficult time.
But, during this past Christmas, she did have to face some backlash over her grief from a cousin.
It all began when she went to have a holiday dinner with her family. And during the meal, a bunch of her relatives apparently kept checking in on her– asking her how she was doing and bringing her food to eat.
That honestly made her feel really loved, and she had a pretty fun time overall. It helped take her mind off of everything else that was going on in her life right now.
One of her cousins was also in attendance, though, and that particular cousin recently lost their late fiancé.
So, her cousin was not talking to family much and mostly just kept to herself– which is pretty understandable.
Ulia Koltyrina – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
However, once she saw her cousin get up to grab a glass of soda, that all changed. Well, first, she asked if her cousin could also grab her a beverage as well.
And immediately afterward, her cousin reportedly freaked out.
She claims that her cousin became really upset before totally going off on her– asking why they should have to bring her things and claiming that she could just get a drink herself.
Now, she was pretty taken aback by the outburst and told her cousin that it was completely fine not to get her a drink.
“I just asked since she was already there, and she was making a big deal,” she reasoned.
After explaining that, though, she claims that her cousin looked like she was about to cry. Moreover, her cousin then started claiming that she expected everyone to just “fawn” over her; meanwhile, everyone in the family got accused of not caring about her cousin or what happened to her cousin’s fiancé.
So, at that point, she decided it was time to set the record straight. She ended up telling her cousin that everyone was just doing their best, and she apologized for her cousin feeling that way.
However, she also pointed out how there was not a “grief competition” going on and claimed her cousin should understand that one person’s feelings are no more valid than another’s.
Some other people at the dinner ended up overhearing their conversation, too, but thankfully, the tension died down, and she believed it was not a huge deal.
Well, that was until later that evening when she received a furious text from her cousin’s sister.
Apparently, the sister claimed that what she said to her cousin was “awful,” and she even got accused of just treating her cousin terribly.
So, ever since Christmas, she has been left wondering if telling her cousin that grief was not a competition was a valid response to the outburst or if it made her a jerk.
Have you ever gone through grief at the same time as another friend or family? Did your challenges ever feel like they were a competition? Do you believe her response to her cousin was warranted or over the line? If you had been in her shoes, how would you have handled this situation?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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