Imagine finding out from your spouse’s best friend that you are supposedly in an open marriage that you never actually agreed to, and there are rumors going around that your spouse is hitting on his students, too. Would you exit the marriage immediately?
This 45-year-old woman works as a professor at a private college where she graduated from. Since she’s been there for so long, she knows pretty much all of the administrative staff and faculty members.
Six years into her career, her husband lost his job working at a different college as an administrator. They had been married for a year at that point.
Her husband claimed that the dean of the college had a bone to pick with him for being more invested in the caliber of the education instead of making money.
She trusted her husband’s version of the story. He quickly found another job teaching, but wasn’t earning a lot, so he asked if he could apply to her college.
She gave him permission, and HR then informed her that her husband put her down as a referral, but he hadn’t said anything to her.
She let HR know they were married, and her husband got the job because they thought so highly of her. She was elated to know they would be making more money, which would lead to a cushier lifestyle.
Not long after her husband started working at her college, he stopped inviting her to hang out with his friends and wouldn’t attend any college events with her.
He cozied up to the administrators and was given extra classes to teach, as well as additional hours. Next, her husband asked her to put a luxury car he wanted to buy on her credit card, since his credit score was atrocious.
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She replied that she didn’t think it was a good idea to spend money on a car, as they were discussing using their money to buy a house.
“He went behind my back and asked his mother (lovely lady and the only thing I missed after the divorce) to put the car on her credit. She agreed because she had no idea about our saving plans, or that I was the main contributor to our finances,” she explained.
“After roughly two years, our relationship had become stagnant. We were more roommates than a couple. This really hurt me since I believed we complimented eachother, me grounding him and him bringing me out of my shell (I’m more of an introvert).”
“I suggested couples counseling, and he said yes, but during our second consultation, he told the therapist he was doing no work to improve the relationship and didn’t know if it was worth the effort. That broke my heart. I was ready to separate, but he asked for more time.”
Since they were only two sessions in, she granted him that. Right after that, her husband’s best friend said her husband wanted to open up their marriage.
Her husband’s best friend addressed this with her since he didn’t think that sounded like something she would agree to do. She then found out that her husband had been telling tons of people they already had an open marriage, but it made her uneasy to speak of, and that there was a rumor flying around their college that he was hitting on some of their female students.
This was curious, as her husband confided in her that he was interested in men and women right after they began dating. She began asking her coworkers if they had heard about the open marriage and her husband showing an interest in students, but she couldn’t prove the student thing.
The biggest issue for her was that her husband lied about them having an open marriage, and she was ready to file for divorce.
She reached out to her family for help, and her sister was on standby to move her stuff out right away. She told her husband she knew about the open marriage and the students, and he didn’t own up to anything.
He asked her to remain in their marriage, but she declined. Several days later, she found a new house to move into, and she took their dog. Their divorce was relatively easy.
“I decided to talk to the university administrators and report what I knew, but I had no evidence and was the (in their eyes) bitter ex,” she said.
“In my country, most of the time, women get blamed when there is harassment. It was insinuated that since my husband is good-looking and extroverted, the students might have been the ones hitting on him.”
“The power dynamic was ignored, and I was asked not to spread rumors that could harm the university’s reputation. Next semester, I was informed via email that the number of classes I would teach had been cut down.”
She could not afford to leave, and so she had a front-row seat to how adored her ex was at the college. All of the staff and students loved him.
With her newfound free time, she started her own company and got one of her coworkers to partner with her on it. Along with her newfound success, she focused on living her best life.
A year after her divorce, another teacher named Daniel requested a meeting with her to discuss a touchy topic. She said yes, and Daniel told her when she saw him for coffee that he had been desperately trying to report her ex to the administrators of the college.
He attempted to out her husband for hitting on his students, but the college warned him to leave it alone. Daniel had uncovered her ex’s relationship with another female student of his, whom he taught at a different college.
“This was no longer an unconfirmed rumor. Social media was evidence enough. I did something I’d been reluctant to do in the past. I called the Vice Dean,” she continued.
“I know her personally and knew I could reach her, but I had never abused the privilege, trying to maintain a professional boundary.”
“The reason I hadn’t called her in the past was that, as much as I believed that my ex was hitting on the female students, it was still something someone had heard from someone else and told me.”
She and Daniel had a meeting with the Vice Dean and told her what they knew. A month later, the evidence was leaked, and male students said her ex had talked about how hot some of the female students were.
Some female students came forward with texts from her ex asking them to go on dates with him. It blew up into an enormous scandal; her ex was instantly fired, and security escorted him off the campus.
Another college her ex worked for fired him, too, and his student girlfriend dumped him when he became unemployed. And honestly? She’s not sorry; she thinks karma served her ex what he deserved.
This went down seven years ago, and last week, she was at a party when she met a man who used to be a student at her college. The guy revealed to her that he had a crazy story about one of the teachers who harassed his students, and he proceeded to show her horrible texts her ex had sent to his female students!
She was so humiliated that, of course, she didn’t say she used to be married to her ex.
“Apparently, he’s known for being a creep who likes really young girls. I feel sorry for his family, who were nothing but nice to me, but I don’t feel sorry that his reputation got destroyed,” she concluded.
Pretty wild, but in the end, if you do wrong, it’s sure to catch up with you.
How crazy is that? What’s the best example of karma you’ve ever heard of?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
