Her Mom Had 18 Kids And She Says It's Unacceptable To Have Large Families, As It's Damaging

Kiara ( @kiaralashabennett on TikTok) says her mom had 18 kids: 9 girls and 9 boys. Kiara is the oldest, and she feels that she exceeds the requirements to speak about the downsides of having large families.

Honestly, Kiara thinks it's unacceptable to have loads of kids. Kiara grew up very poor, but even if her mom had money or she had a present father in her life, she still believes she would have turned out the exact same way, which is messed up.

Yes, Kiara feels that growing up with so many siblings did mess her up, and she gets into why that is.

"There is no amount of anything that will allow two people or one person to evenly distribute love, affection, support, to that many children at any given time," Kiara explained in her video.

"There are mothers and fathers out here who literally need a break from one to two children. Just imagine how much of a break that person needs when there are 12, 13, 14, 18 children, and best believe, every single time, the parent takes that break."

"In the event that they constantly take those breaks, and let's just say they don't, there are still children who are not getting the love they want, not getting the support they need, not getting the hugs they need, not getting the talks that they need."

Kiara maintained there's no way for a parent to divide themselves up and their time into equal portions that benefit every single child that they have; someone will always still be lacking something.

Kiara is 37 and still trying to heal from a home bursting with children. She doesn't care if you live in a mansion; every kid can't even take a break from their siblings because there are simply too many people under one roof.

Kiara outlined that this is way too chaotic an environment to grow up in, and her cortisol levels have been sky-high for as long as she can remember.

davit85 - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual children - pictured above are kids playing outside

Kiara then pointed out that it's unfair to rely on the oldest children to help parent their siblings or pitch in, but it always happens.

Kiara said that in pregnancy reveal videos that people share announcing another baby on the way in a family with kids in the double digits already, you can spot the oldest kid because of the look on their face.

"I had the same look on my face when my mom would come home with a baby, because at some point, she just stopped telling us she was pregnant and she'd disappear for three or four days; she'd be at the hospital giving birth, and bring back a new baby," Kiara shared.

"You guys do not understand the trauma behind this. No one cares if you think you can afford it. You may be able to afford a little bit more than the average person when it comes to finances, but you can't mentally or emotionally afford it, I can assure you that."

"And the people that suffer are the oldest kids in general. All of the kids suffer. But you can always tell who's suffering the most and the oldest by the look on their face when y'all reveal there's another baby coming. And yes, I think it's selfish."

Additionally, Kiara shed light on how there's likely abuse going on at home with families this big.

You can view the video on TikTok here.